Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Sometimes you need a break... and some confidence

Hi, how ya been?

No, no, not you, silly. My bike, my sneakers and my swimsuit.

Yes, I've taken a few weeks days off.

In all seriousness it's been a full week. This holiday season has completely destroyed my motivation. I'm exhausted and the pile of toys that's taken over my living room keeps calling my name, so my workouts have taken a back seat for now. I'm planning my big comeback soon, just not today.

During my unscheduled hiatus, I have noticed a few things worth mentioning. First and foremost is my times are getting faster. It's only a few seconds, but I really believe the structured workouts Joanna is giving me are doing their job. I was skeptical at first, but you can see the times yourself.

The other thing is that aside from improving my times, what I really need to work on is my self confidence. In my phone, I have a short list of motivational quotes.

Among those quotes is this, suspiciously alone, but for some reason I've kept it.

Confidence, I lack it. Clearly. I have no reason to not feel confident in my abilities, but something holds me back, each and every time.

Every run, if I feel like I'm going out too hard, I pull back. Don't want to lose my breath. If I start out too hard on the bike, I pull back, don't want to bonk half way home. If I'm swimming, I take things slow and easy, prefer not to drink the pool water and clearly drowning is a fear.

So, I wonder, what is it that holds me back. I've set out on bike rides that I have to repeat to myself over and over again, "I AM a triathlete. I CAN do this." Like I need to convince myself each and every ride that I am capable of achieving my goals ... on purpose. Not by a freak accident. 

Now, to be clear, I am not totally down on myself. It's not like I'm walking around feeling like I can't do anything. It's mostly just finding that certain something that pulls you through when you're body is screaming "NO" (or I DON'T WANNA GET OUTTA BED).

So, in addition to getting my rear to Eagleman, I am working on my confidence. My question to you, what do you do to boost your confidence? Love hearing from you, so don't be shy.


  1. I have HUGE issues with confidence, too, so I can totally practice what I preach on this one. That said, I think YOU might want to try being YOUR OWN barometer for your own success. We are all different, our bodies respond differently and need different things at different times. You acknowledged you've improved your times a few seconds, but then said "it's only a few seconds." Dude, you've earned every one of those seconds you've managed to drop off. YOU did that. It didn't just happen. And props to Joanna for giving you the tools, but you're the one putting them to work. The one wish I would have for you is to realize how AWESOME you are for simply putting in the effort and being accountable to yourself for all you have accomplished and are still working on accomplishing. You are definitely your harshest critic. Maybe you need to get out of your own way and focus on all the great things you have done and continue to do. And remember it's a journey, not a destination. Perhaps doing so would give you a boost to go even farther, faster.

  2. Yes, I agree with Brandie. Everyone is different and that is ok. Good advice. Diane, I love all your quotes. The thing that gets me through is not the speed, or the place, it is just the simple fact that I know I can finish and finish smiling and proud. There are so many people that would never do what we do. Be proud of that. Tammy